“What Not to Do When Your First Love Breaks Up with You,” or “How Andrea F*cked Things Up”

  1. For the love of God, talk to a girlfriend about it, not the people you shouldn’t be talking to about it.
  2. Don’t do reckless things that could get you — or someone else — fired.
  3. Don’t speed.
  4. Even though you’ve already written them, and they’re already stamped, and they’re not doing you any good, don’t send him the love letters you wrote.
  5. Same for that T-shirt you bought him. He will call you obsessive, which you are. He will be creeped out, and rightfully so.
  6. Do listen to the customer who told you to write “Don’t contact him” on an index card to insert in your wallet. (FYI, if it wasn’t obvious, I did not do this.)
  7. Do listen to your friends when they tell you that you are moving too quickly. You are.
  8. Do keep the books he gave you, but don’t use them as an excuse to reach out to him.
  9. In fact, stop contacting him altogether. It’s the healthiest thing to do.
  10. Do ask out the guy you’ve been wanting to ask out for two years — because who knows?
  11. Don’t beat yourself up about the letters — even if you hadn’t sent them, it wouldn’t have changed the outcome. God has someone out there for you who is better suited for you.
  12. Don’t worry about whether or not he was in love with you, or if you loved him more than he loved you, or if you were simply infatuated with him. It no longer matters.
  13. Don’t beat yourself up when you hear songs that remind him of you. Be grateful for those memories.
  14. Do grieve as long as you need to.
  15. Do see this as a learning experience, a necessary one, and move on.



About Andrea Nicole

NZ enthusiast in the PNW. Internationally published writer, educator, grammar nerd, genealogist, and all-around storyteller. Recovering homebody. @Whitworth and @WGU alumna. #edchat
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